A MAN who attempted to chat up a woman in a dog park has been outed as a loather of dogs pretty much immediately.
THOSE French students rioting in the streets? That’s limbs, man. And we’re going to do the same because they’re right, school ...
THE Nobel Peace Prize has been awarded, and once again President Trump has been overlooked in favour of a nobody. What does he have to do? Denys Finch Hatton, cartographer: “He’s already stopped every ...
THE BBC is to launch a £10m probe into claims of sexually suggestive language in its 1970s cartoons. The inquiry will focus on previously false allegations that popular children’s programme Captain ...
In Munich, the festival occupies every park with hundreds of benches and marquees hosting seven million a year. In your town? There’s Lidl car park and the primary school’s sports field which will be ...
THE idea of Hannah Fry being a good girl gone bad has pushed the sexual urges of middle-aged men to breaking point. The maths professor’s transition from Faithful to Traitor in last night’s episode of ...
A THREESOME has been thrown into crisis after it became apparent that one member of the trio was contributing significantly less than the other two. The three-way evening of erotic delight descended ...
JEFFREY Archer, 1940-2026, statesman, bestselling author, Olympic 100m sprint gold medallist, astronaut, and faithful husband has passed on. In his own words: Jeffrey Archer was born to humble ...
Girlfriend babbling on about the vivid carpet of colours autumn brings? Those leaves are the scarlet of death. Trees shed all their foliage, not giving a shit about the mess they’ve made, and a few ...
AFTER Jon Bon Jovi successfully prevented a suicide attempt on a bridge, Radiohead’s Thom Yorke has attempted to do likewise with slightly less positive results. When the singer saw Charlotte Phelps ...
BRITAIN ain’t what it used to be, mate. You can’t get a GP appointment, the bin collections are fortnightly and you can’t get a decent job without being ‘fired’ for ‘fraudulent expenses’. It’s the ...
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